I can't remember where I heard this, but I've been carrying this piece of paper around in my purse with these words: Obeying yourself into a crisis is glorious. Obeying yourself into a test that only God can deliver from is an amazing step of obedience...Obey beyond your alternatives.
When I wrote this down, I thought it sounded pretty cool. But as I read over these words again, I can't help but wonder if I'm truly being obedient??
If you know me at all, you know that I like things neatly packaged (preferably in pink and glitter), my ducks in a row, check marks on the to-do list...and, I like obedience for the sake of obedience. What?! I obey (and think everyone else should obey) cuz it's the right thing to do...that's how I earn my 'A'...that's how I know I'm on the right track... But is it really??
When I read these words...the obedience that he's talking about isn't simply obeying cuz it's the right thing to do. In fact, when I really dig deep into what these words say to me, it's almost like he's giving permission to get an 'F' so that God can do HIS work and bring about the 'A'. I don't always worry about the inside or what it takes to keep the outside looking pretty; my sinful nature is consumed with the final grade and what others see. How does that reflect God in my life? How does that allow others to see God working in my life if my life appears all-together?
The truth is, my obedience is superficial at times...and purely for the satisfaction of saying I didn't do it wrong. I'm not saying that God wants me to disobey. My brain has simply taken obedience to the 'nth' degree, where any waver from the very strict line I've drawn for myself is blatantly disobedient. And God is showing me that my warped version of obedience is NOT His truth... I'm not looking for a crisis; I am looking for God's best for my life. I'm looking for what God can do in my life to be glorified...and I'm taking a step of faith and obedience into seeking what that is...
Monday, June 14, 2010
Obedience
I can't remember where I heard this, but I've been carrying this piece of paper around in my purse with these words: Obeying yourself into a crisis is glorious. Obeying yourself into a test that only God can deliver from is an amazing step of obedience...Obey beyond your alternatives.
When I wrote this down, I thought it sounded pretty cool. But as I read over these words again, I can't help but wonder if I'm truly being obedient??
If you know me at all, you know that I like things neatly packaged (preferably in pink and glitter), my ducks in a row, check marks on the to-do list...and, I like obedience for the sake of obedience. What?! I obey (and think everyone else should obey) cuz it's the right thing to do...that's how I earn my 'A'...that's how I know I'm on the right track... But is it really??
When I read these words...the obedience that he's talking about isn't simply obeying cuz it's the right thing to do. In fact, when I really dig deep into what these words say to me, it's almost like he's giving permission to get an 'F' so that God can do HIS work and bring about the 'A'. I don't always worry about the inside or what it takes to keep the outside looking pretty; my sinful nature is consumed with the final grade and what others see. How does that reflect God in my life? How does that allow others to see God working in my life if my life appears all-together?
The truth is, my obedience is superficial at times...and purely for the satisfaction of saying I didn't do it wrong. I'm not saying that God wants me to disobey. My brain has simply taken obedience to the 'nth' degree, where any waver from the very strict line I've drawn for myself is blatantly disobedient. And God is showing me that my warped version of obedience is NOT His truth... I'm not looking for a crisis; I am looking for God's best for my life. I'm looking for what God can do in my life to be glorified...and I'm taking a step of faith and obedience into seeking what that is...
When I wrote this down, I thought it sounded pretty cool. But as I read over these words again, I can't help but wonder if I'm truly being obedient??
If you know me at all, you know that I like things neatly packaged (preferably in pink and glitter), my ducks in a row, check marks on the to-do list...and, I like obedience for the sake of obedience. What?! I obey (and think everyone else should obey) cuz it's the right thing to do...that's how I earn my 'A'...that's how I know I'm on the right track... But is it really??
When I read these words...the obedience that he's talking about isn't simply obeying cuz it's the right thing to do. In fact, when I really dig deep into what these words say to me, it's almost like he's giving permission to get an 'F' so that God can do HIS work and bring about the 'A'. I don't always worry about the inside or what it takes to keep the outside looking pretty; my sinful nature is consumed with the final grade and what others see. How does that reflect God in my life? How does that allow others to see God working in my life if my life appears all-together?
The truth is, my obedience is superficial at times...and purely for the satisfaction of saying I didn't do it wrong. I'm not saying that God wants me to disobey. My brain has simply taken obedience to the 'nth' degree, where any waver from the very strict line I've drawn for myself is blatantly disobedient. And God is showing me that my warped version of obedience is NOT His truth... I'm not looking for a crisis; I am looking for God's best for my life. I'm looking for what God can do in my life to be glorified...and I'm taking a step of faith and obedience into seeking what that is...
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1 comment:
Well said! Sometimes I feel like everything I'm doing is to get an "atta-girl" instead of to glorify HIS ideas for me.
Love you girl!
~Miranda
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